Mabini Hall - Access to Justice

The Filipino’s penchant for making jokes continues to hit the headlines. In a span of two weeks, two incidents of bomb jokes resulted in two arrests, two court cases and more than two very messed up lives. That one happened each week is by no means a national average but is symptomatic of who we are the way we crack jokes that are definitely not funny but outright dangerous.

The first traveler, replying to a query from a flight attendant, said that his bulky luggage contained a bomb. The second was a couple who were overheard saying that they too had a bomb. These people were already on the plane heading home from heady vacations with overeating and over-swiping. They were arrested, offloaded from the plane and detained. It is wrong to think that because you are already on the plane that you are already immune from the clutches of the aviation laws or that you can now feel safe having gone through several checks. Especially in times like with these with all the terrorist lingo, making bomb jokes is a serious offense.

An attempt at a logical explanation: we try to make light of the tense and stressful situation and make fun of the private authorities. (I am sure no one will say these things in front of uniformed law enforcers.) It is an innate and inane adaptive mechanism that helps us cope and also gets us into trouble. We are used to ‘tripping’ as we are of taking trips, to live on the edge but not really falling off.

Of course, that no bomber will admit to his possession of a bomb is not a defense. Bomb jokes cause anxiety on everyone and when misinterpreted, may result in panic and mayhem. What do we get out of it rather than a fleeting feeling of amusement and a brief moment of braggadocio?

In a related story, there were several reports last quarter last year of passengers who were found with live ammunition. Some of our OFW’s string a bullet for a necklace as anting-anting or amulet for protection. This is a no-no and is definitely a violation. The worst joke is when a bullet suddenly emerges from the handbag or the backpack of a passenger. He is technically in flagrante delicto, that is, in the act of committing a crime – carrying or transporting ammo. You know what happens next. At airports, the risk is not only the things you lose but the things that are found.

Another joke far more deadly and more prevalent happens every night at videoke joints. What crueler joke is there than to sing “My Way” without regard to tune or melody? People kill and people die for the right to sing and the right to impose on others the right not to sing – in a particular way. The strange thing is that people can possibly sing better under the influence of alcohol. Oftentimes though and at the expense of their lives and singing careers, they don’t. People’s sense of hearing too is not deadened but heightened with the onset of liquor. Bottom line – never mix alcohol with “My Way.” Violate this rule and you will be quickly on your way to the highway. Talk about the rule of law and the freedom to sing under our Constitution, huh.

And then there are the ‘siga’ jokes, literally “looks that kill.” If you stare at someone at a certain way or get stared back in another way, that inevitably results to a fistfight and possibly a gunbattle. It is not a joke to hangout in bars and other dimly lit places and claim that you were watching the wall or ogling at something else. Injuries and death are the highest prices in the menu.

Tomorrow, I will troop to Congress to file a bill banning the singing of “My Way” in all public places especially at campaign rallies. I will also file a bill mandating the wearing of sunglasses at night. Finally, a bill that defines the word ‘joke.’ Nowadays, the solution to every problem lies in the passage of laws that are never passed anyway.

When is a joke a joke and when is it not? The answer is simple: it is not when you’re no longer around to laugh at your own joke.